Wednesday, October 10, 2007!
HandWritten on; 11:29 PM
Sensitivity.Definition: The ability to respond to affective changes in your interpersonal environment
& some people just don't get it.
What's wrong? Is it a normal part of ur life to owaes use ur bloody damn words to put me down n just ruin my day(s)? Does it makes u feel better? Does it makes u feel superior than me? Do you even know u
hurt me?
Just as every human being has moods n tolerance. U just cant take it for granted. N it's not the only way to make urself feel better. It just hurt the people around you, people who tried talking to you. Who genuinely tries to be ur frends, but they were not spared from ur blunt comments. I
MAY be the only one tht is AFFECTED and PISSED by this, but i just don't get it why m i subjected to these almost every freaking morning.
Every word, every sentence, every comment coming out from my mouth, u will have
sth to say,
sth to argue back,
sth to make me look bad,
sth to embarass me
Hello.
I don't owe my life to u therefore i shldnt be subjected to ur 'verbal abuse'. If your mood is damn bad, go bloody tok to someone who can accept ur nonsense. When i say talk, i really meant talk and not just arguing back or commenting on stuffs tht i just mentioned. IT JUST MAKES NO SENSE. If you just want me to fall n look bad n ugly. TELL ME STRAIGHT IN THE FACE. Thrs no nid for such uncalled actions.
We are frends, or at least i consider u as one. N i really have no idea why this is happening btw us.
You probably may/may not noe tht i m toking about u. But, tht probably oso mean tht i just dun wanna broach on this topic to you just yet. However, it also means tht i m losing hope on this VRY FRENDSHIP tht i hold on dearly to. Not tht u r unaware of this prob. I suppose you know, u just dun wanna acknowledge it, or probably, just feel tht thrs nth wrong w/ ur actions.
And thts precisely the prob.
Becos u feel u are RIGHT and all the more i can do nth bout this problem.
It's not an open conversation. Nth can go in unless some rubbish thinking is out of ur mind.
And i probably have to admit if
tht faithful day comes when we have to tok about this face-to-face. It would probably mean the end of this FRIENDSHIP tht i used to treasure.
Sometimes, i just feel like a microphone to you. You
MAY say wateva u want to me(be it happy, sad or just about anything under the sun), but i may
NOT talk to you bout these just like how u could.
Call this self-centered or wat
Maybe, i really misunderstood but thts the onli conclusion i can have for now. Since when did u really give me a genuine solution when i nidded help n consulted u on my probs? None. U just constantly shoot me back wif more n more qns. N how much suggestions did i gave u when u consulted me for stuffs? I sincerely helped u in hope tht u will feel better, things get better n we forged stronger bonds in the process. Yet, this aint happening. N it just won't happen because,
thrs no reciprocation.
It just makes me feel tht i m nth, but a small little insignificant role in your life whom u can count on when u nidded my accompany.
Some may argued that as a
FRIEND, he/she shld give unconditional care and concern and not mind about how the other party treats u. This, of coz i agree. Yet, yours truly aint a holy to put up w/ nonsense n be helpful n caring at the same time for such a LONG PERIOD of time. It just wun happen.
I dun really know y i post this up, maybe i just nidda get it off my chest. Afterall, today is a real bad day for me w/ all these nonsense happening btw us. N maybe, to let u noe how i feel all these while ever since after we tried settling this same old prob months ago. You probably were better after we tried to solve, but, u reverted back to the same old you.
I just aint have any solutions to this problem anymore.
Helpless,
period.
I just dun get it.
